Well, here I am again. Twice in one week....wow! Today was not the best day ever, but I'm alive and with my children this evening so I can't complain. Brendan was home sick from school today and MacKenzie's not feeling well either. She made me hold her most of the night. Every time I laid her in her bed she would roll to her side and I'd think she was going to be okay, but by the time I made it back to my bed she was screaming. So, I slept most of the night in my recliner with her and needless to say it wasn't good sleep at all. I'm pretty tired, but I need this "me" time before I go to bed.
Yesterday I made some incredible red velvet cupcakes and took a few to work today. I also made carrot cake cupcakes as well, but they were from a box as was the frosting so they weren't nearly as good as my red velvet ones from scratch. I also made some lime cream cheese mints. I think my coworkers really enjoyed them, but I did get the best reaction out of the red velvet cupcakes.
Tomorrow I'm off from the hospital, but I teach course 3 in the evening. I'll be teaching royal icing lily nail flowers so I need to brush up on those.
So, on to the reflection for which I chose the title of today's blog. Amidst my tears and reflecting time the other night I got to thinking about my purpose in this life. What is it? Am I already doing it and just don't know it? Have I missed my calling? Lord, I want to go where you want me to go and do what you want me to do and I hope that I am already doing it, but I just don't know for sure. I want to find my ministry area and totally commit to it. Lord, I want to fulfill your purpose for me. Ahh and as I type that I am reminded that I have "The Purpose Driven Life" on my bookshelf and have yet to read it. Guess it's time, huh God? I have always been driven to music. Always felt an intense desire to get up on stage and bring beautiful music to many people. I used to think it was country music I wanted to sing, but in the last 5 years or so I have found a true love for contemporary christian music. I watch the band on Sunday mornings and I want to be up there, but when I contacted the people in charge they didn't want to even hear me sing. They said they had enough members, but I know others have joined since then. I thought God was calling me to that, but I must have been wrong. Thing is, how come I still feel the pull in that direction if it's not right?
I so want to be involved totally and whole-heartedly in my church in some ministry so that I can help bring people to Christ, but I don't know what that ministry is. Jeremy and I have been asked to help with the children's ministry and we'll give it all we can, but I'm just not sure that's my niche.
So anyways, that's what's on my mind this evening. Time to get to bed before MacKenzie decides to wake up.
God Bless,
Lisa
"911, What's Your Emergency?"
13 years ago
Our church is doing a book study on "One Month to Live". It's about how to identify what's realy important to you and live each day to the fullest. I've only read the first two days (although I'm going at a pace of a day per week, so I hope I have 30 weeks to live), but I know lots of people have been very moved by it so far.
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean about not knowing where your calling really lies. I always thought mine was teaching (and mostly still do), but I'm always so conflicted balancing family time and work time. Focusing on one, and being successful at one, always results in a complete neglect for the other. And then there's church. I love working with the children's ministries. It's fun to teach a different age group and not have the pressures of state assessments and such. The first & second graders that I taught in Sunday School this summer were so much fun, and it was easy to prepare for since I didn't have school.
Hope you have a better night tonight! I know I'm not the only mom who's been there before - and I"m sure you've been there before, too. :)
LYLAS!!