Still not 100%

Well, the kids all seem to have gotten over this bug, but my old body is holding on to it tightly. I have a terrible cough and a headache that comes and goes....but when it's here it's all I can do to keep my head up. I want to take something for the cough, but don't think there's anything out there safe for breastfeeding. I hope I heal soon.

Not much else going on around here. This is my weekend to work so I'm there most of the day while Jeremy hangs out with the kids. I hate working on Sundays because I miss church. Someday I won't have to work Sundays and I'll be able to be at church every week.

I checked on my class enrollment for this month today. Only 1 spot left in my course one and 4 spots in my Fondant & Gumpaste. Not bad for my fourth month.

Well, there's really not much to tell so I won't bore you. Till next time....stay healthy!

And now they've given it to me!

Yes, whatever the kids have been sharing this week they have now shared with me. MacKenzie didn't sleep well again last night. She spent most of the night in our bed instead of hers. So, I took a nap before I had to go teach. I started coughing through my nap and awoke with a 101 temperature. Joy!

So, short blog tonight as I am headed to bed because I have to work tomorrow.

May this night find you healthy!

God Bless,
Lisa

Another Reflection

Well, here I am again. Twice in one week....wow! Today was not the best day ever, but I'm alive and with my children this evening so I can't complain. Brendan was home sick from school today and MacKenzie's not feeling well either. She made me hold her most of the night. Every time I laid her in her bed she would roll to her side and I'd think she was going to be okay, but by the time I made it back to my bed she was screaming. So, I slept most of the night in my recliner with her and needless to say it wasn't good sleep at all. I'm pretty tired, but I need this "me" time before I go to bed.

Yesterday I made some incredible red velvet cupcakes and took a few to work today. I also made carrot cake cupcakes as well, but they were from a box as was the frosting so they weren't nearly as good as my red velvet ones from scratch. I also made some lime cream cheese mints. I think my coworkers really enjoyed them, but I did get the best reaction out of the red velvet cupcakes.

Tomorrow I'm off from the hospital, but I teach course 3 in the evening. I'll be teaching royal icing lily nail flowers so I need to brush up on those.

So, on to the reflection for which I chose the title of today's blog. Amidst my tears and reflecting time the other night I got to thinking about my purpose in this life. What is it? Am I already doing it and just don't know it? Have I missed my calling? Lord, I want to go where you want me to go and do what you want me to do and I hope that I am already doing it, but I just don't know for sure. I want to find my ministry area and totally commit to it. Lord, I want to fulfill your purpose for me. Ahh and as I type that I am reminded that I have "The Purpose Driven Life" on my bookshelf and have yet to read it. Guess it's time, huh God? I have always been driven to music. Always felt an intense desire to get up on stage and bring beautiful music to many people. I used to think it was country music I wanted to sing, but in the last 5 years or so I have found a true love for contemporary christian music. I watch the band on Sunday mornings and I want to be up there, but when I contacted the people in charge they didn't want to even hear me sing. They said they had enough members, but I know others have joined since then. I thought God was calling me to that, but I must have been wrong. Thing is, how come I still feel the pull in that direction if it's not right?

I so want to be involved totally and whole-heartedly in my church in some ministry so that I can help bring people to Christ, but I don't know what that ministry is. Jeremy and I have been asked to help with the children's ministry and we'll give it all we can, but I'm just not sure that's my niche.

So anyways, that's what's on my mind this evening. Time to get to bed before MacKenzie decides to wake up.

God Bless,
Lisa

Reflections

So, it turns out I'm not as good at this as I thought I'd be. I should have known better. How many times did I start a journal growing up and never got very far before I forgot it or got too busy. But I am determined to do better. I am determined to put my thoughts, hopes, dreams, and random mumblings on "paper". If for no one else but for my children. Because someday they may just want to know their mother better than they already do. I know I want to know my mother and father better and it's hard to get that conversation rolling. With my Mom I've tried a "grandmother's memoirs" book, but I'll bet ya a million dollars it's still empty. I want to hear stories from my father's life, but I just can't figure out a good way to bring it up.

Anyways, I did a lot of reflecting on myself and this thing I call my life last night. I followed a link KLOVE put on facebook to a blog by the wife of one of the members of Selah. I couldn't just start at the current day as there was too much history to catch up on so I started at the beginning. Angie is a beautiful writer. I only wish I could be as elegant as she is with her words. I can only wish I had the insight into life and the Lord our God that she has. But I am learning a lot from her. Learning about myself, about the Lord, and countless other things. I wasn't able to catch up to current day with her blog and it will take me several sittings to do so, but I so enjoyed it. God has given her a gift and although she found her outlet through an unfortunate series of events I am sooo glad she chose to share her deepest thoughts and feelings with whomever wants to take the time to read a bit. Thank you Lord for Angie Smith.

That being said, my reflections brought me to a place within me that I didn't particularly care for. A place that I want to change, for the better. Yes, I believe Jesus is my Lord and savior and I have for as long as I can remember. However, my relationship with my Lord is not what I want it to be. I want more and I know He does too. I want to find, or rather make, the time to just sit and talk to Him and listen for His response. I want to hear Him talk to me and know that it is Him and not just MY own mind. I want to learn how to do that. I want to teach my kids about that personal relationship that He wants to have with them and get them started on that now. I want to read the bible cover to cover. I want to be able to quote the bible with reference. You'd think I could do that after all these years, but no matter how strong my faith is I have not been disciplined enough to learn all that.

The thing I learned that disturbed me the most and brought me to tears just as the story of Audrey Caroline did is that I think I have been taking things for granted. That is not who I thought I was. I thought I was good at being thankful and aware of how blessed I am, but I certainly didn't feel that way last night. I am soooooooo blessed. The Lord has blessed me with a wonderful family, a nice home, food, clothing, two jobs, and so much more. I NEVER want to take that for granted and although it was painful the return to reality is much appreciated.

I also felt like I am not the parent I could be. That I am not enough for my children as I am. I want more for them. I want better for them. So, I'm going to be better in whatever ways I can...in every way that I can....every day!

Well, I've had enough emotion to last me for awhile so I'll stop there for now and hopefully I'll be blogging again soon with better thoughts and happenings.

So my final thought for you is to be thankful for all you have. Thanksgiving is fast approaching so lets take some time to really think about all the blessings in our lives and be sure to thank the one who gives them to you as well.

God Bless each and every one,
Lisa

Long Day

Well the day has come to an end and I am sooooo ready to call it a night. Up at 4 to feed the baby and get to work by 6. Off at 2:30 to come home to shower and get ready for class. After teaching my class I met Jeremy and MacKenzie to go meet up with an old friend driving through town. Back home at 10:30 to put MacKenzie to bed, grab a bite, play online for a few minutes, and now off to bed. Brendan, Devon, Bailey, and Garrett are all at Nanna and Papas for a few days so it's just Mom, Dad, and MacKenzie. Sure am glad I'm off tomorrow....my feet hurt!

Library Tuesday

Today is library Tuesday around our house. So off to the library we went for Brendan and Devon to check out books while Bailey and Garrett went to storytime. Unbeknownst to me, storytime was actually a puppet show today instead. So as I watched with the 3 youngest, Brendan and Devon proceeded to find around 15 books a piece. I'm so glad they love to read. Devon is almost done with hers already. And she didn't even stay inside and read all day. She was outside for a long time too. Granted she is not reading all chapter books, but they are not beginners books either.

After that we ran some errands and came home for lunch and naps. Naps rolled straight into dinner and then I had to do my chores. Now I'm trying to make it to bed so that I can get up at 4 for work. Just working on putting a few things on my iPod for tomorrow before I go.

Beginning something new!

As if I don't spend too much time on the internet as it is with my new addiction to facebook, I've decided to start a blog. I don't know how much I'll write, how often I'll write, or how interesting it will be. I've started a journal several times in my life wanting to document things for posterity, but they have never lasted long. We'll see if I do any better with this or not. I think this will be good for the first entry as I really need to get some sleep. It's raining outside and it's time to just enjoy it as I fall asleep. (Like that'll take more than 2.3 seconds!)